Monday, April 11, 2011

It has been far too long

I haven't blogged in what seems like forever. I'll be honest life has gotten the best of me. With trying to survive my last semester of college, plan a wedding, and figure out to do with my life, I really haven't any time to blog. I have been on & have been reading all of your blogs. But I'm a horrible person and I haven't even left a single comment. For that, I apologize. I promise I'm going to try blogging so much more. With college ending in a short 38 days (OMG ! Panic mood), I will hopefully have more time to devote to my blog and following everyones.

On that note, I should probably catch ya'll up on my life, if you're interested that is! :P The last time I blogged, back in February hubs and I were trying to decide if I was going to go out to Japan to visit him. Well we decided that I would. And it was the very best decision! We realllly needed to see each other and spend some quality time together. Aside from being in Tokyo when the earthquake happened (that's a whole other story) the trip was amazing. I got to see J's base and where he works. I got to meet his friends and some coworkers. And I really got to experience what life is like on the Island. I didn't want to leave and I had a really hard time walking away after the week was over. But I'm planning another trip for June, with another Milspouse. As long as J is still there. He's supposed to be hearing news soon about coming home and doing all his separation stuff. It's bittersweet. We've been together for 2 years, and all this time we've been a military couple. Now, we're going to be a civilian couple. It's a strange feeling. Exciting, nervous, anxious, happy all rolled up into one little ball. I'm excited and happy for no more separations, no more deployments, no more long distance phone calls or skype dates. But I'm nervous and anxious because I have no idea what comes next. He knows what he wants to do when he gets out. But who knows where his job will take us? But as long as him and I are together, that is really all that matters to me. Sometimes, I wish he'd reenlist. The reassurance of always having a job, healthcare, money in the bank..all of that helps me feel better about the future. But right now, it's like everything is so uncertain. We have noo idea where we'll be 10 months from now. I think what I'm going to miss most of all is having this loving community of military spouses that I can go to, day or not, phone or email, and they are always there. with no hesitation, no pause, nothing. they are always there to comfort me. And after this year, I won't belong to that group anymore. So, where will I belong? I don't really know I guess. I am exciting to start this new chapter and really start our lives together. But I'm soo nervous too.

Speaking of Milspouses, I was reading another Milspouse's blog (sorry, can't remember who!) and there was a post about another Milspouse posting about ending her life. I just want to say my prayers are with you. I have heard that it was unsuccesful and you are still with us, on this earth. And I pray to God that it stays that way. I don't understand why, but just know there are tons and tons of people who are thinking of you and praying for you. This post really got me thinking about how short life truly is. I mean, I've known it, obviously. I feel like we all have, especially because we are Military wives. But still. It just really got me thinking and appreciating the people in my life even more. Jessica, I am praying for you and I really hope you find comfort in how many people have been praying for you and thinking of you.

I promise to write more! I need to get to homework now.

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Thursday, February 3, 2011

Do or don't?

I'm not quite sure what to do. J & I have been talking about me going to Japan for Spring Break. I have a week off of classes, with doing going on why not? We really want to see each other. It's so different when there's a computer screen between the two of you. & I must say, I'm a bit sick of blowing kisses to a webcam. Don't get me wrong, I am so grateful we get to video chat as often as we do. But I'm ready to be in his arms again. I know, I know, he did just come home for Christmas. But I want to go out there. I want to his base, I want to see the beautiful ocean, and eat their foods. I just want to be with my J. There's a huge possibility that J is getting out of the Marine Corps earlier then expected. So my plan to visit the entire summer isn't going to happen..which I'm super happy about. I'd much rather him be home & out of the Corps earlier then planned, then spend my summer there. So, Spring Break is really my only option to go out there.

So why not go? Oh I'll tell you why are expensive, actually they're beyond expensive. On top of that, we need to find somewhere for me to stay for the week I'm out there, because I obviously can't sleep in his barracks..or maybe I can sneak it..Haha. Just kidding. So I looked into the hotels that they have on his base. There is one on his actually base, and a tons of others on the other bases. The one on his base is about $75 a night. Which, comparatively, isn't that bad. If I were to stay off base at a regular hotel, it would be double that..probably even triple in some places. So we decided..I'd stay at this hotel. It's right near his barracks & work. So it's a prime location. & since it's so close, obviously he'd stay with me. Perfect, right? Wrong. When J called the hotel the other day to talk about making a reservation, the lady told him that March is PCS season. So, anyone that's PCSing will be put on the list before us. Okay, that makes sense. I understand. But she said because there will probably be soo many people PCSing, we're on Space A at the moment. She pretty much told  him, there is no guarantee your wife will have some place to stay. Well what the hell am I supposed to do?! She suggested going to the other bases hotels but, again, it's PCS season, apparently, so she said they're probably going to fill up pretty fast too. Ughhh. Even if I can stay in a hotel on another base, that's a cab ride J has to take to work every morning. Which is going to add buckoo bucks! So now, we need to decide what to do. I can go out there & hope they have some place for me to stay, or find somewhere off base. Why does this all have to be soo expensive. I wish I were a millionaire!

On a completely different note. I'm starting to get into the nitty gritty of wedding planning. I go to meet with a florist tomorrow. I was wondering if you ladies had any ideas of flower types. I know for my bouquet I want red roses. But I'm not sure what I would like my Bridesmaids to carry. Our wedding is in November. & the girls are wearing read. So far, red is the only color I have picked out. I was thinking of doing small gold accents here & there. But I'm not sure..any ideas? I do know that I don't want anything blue. But I was thinking of having the girls carry white flowers..uhh I have noo idea! Any ideas at all would be sooo helpful! :)

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Saturday, January 22, 2011

I'm back :)

It has been wayy too long since I've posted. Let's see..last time I wrote, J was coming home for Christmas. I must say, it was the best Christmas I've ever had. I can't even explain how great it felt being able to spend this Christmas with my husband. We didn't get to spend the holidays together last year because he was deployed. And we were both so worried he wouldn't get leave to come home. But luckily, the Marines were nice this time and he got to come home! We spent 10 wonderful days together. We spent time doing all the wonderful things couples do during the holidays..we drank hot chocolate & looked at Christmas lights, we watched a ton of Christmas movies, made a gingerbread house, went to mass together on Christmas eve, exchanged gifts, and got our pictures taken by Taylor @ Skinnie Piggie. Her husband is good friends with J. So it was great being able to catch up with them. Overall, the 10 days we got to spend together were absolutely amazing. I'm not sure when we'll see each other next..hopefully for spring break. I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas & New Years. Here's some pictures that Taylor took! :)

After the holidays, I left for India. It was much better then I thought it was going to be. I was having a problem adjusting at first and I was reallly homesick the first week there. I didn't like the food at all. But after awhile I got used to it. The culture is completely different. Besides the food and the way they treat the women, I loved almost all of the culture. The music was awesome. And their clothing is adorable. I loved the exchange rate..haha. I definitely spent too much money! Overall though, tt was definitely a life changing experience. I don't regret going. It changed the way I thought about alot of things..but I don't think I'd go back.

Good news..I found my wedding dress!! :)
Hope everyone is having a great weekend!

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Wednesday, December 8, 2010

A little over a week!!

In a little over a week, my hubby will be home for Christmas!! Yayy! He's only been gone just about two months & I miss him like crazyyyy. We talk almost everyday and skype every day on the weekends, but for some reason being away from him has been really hard on me. So, needless to say, I am so very excited! This is our second Christmas as a couple, but it's our first time being able to celebrate the holidays together. He was deployed on Christmas last year. So this is our first official Christmas together! Yay!! I can't wait to do all the wonderful Christmasy things together, like bake cookies and listen to Christmas music, look at Christmas lights and watch all the wonderful Christmas movies together. Christmas is my all time favorite part of the year. I love absolutely everything about it. And I just cannot wait to spend it with my honey :) And school is almost over for the semester! Ohhh yeahh!! Tomorrow is the last day of classes and then I have four finals next week. And then it's hubby time for 10 whole days!! Ahhh! But then...I leave for India. And I haven't decided if I'm excited about my trip or really nervous..I think it's a little of both. I'm excited to experience an entirely different culture. But I'm really nervous..nervous about the food, the people, my safety. All sorts of things. J says it shouldn't be too terrible. But what does he know lol. 

Life has been extremely hectic lately & I'm sorry I haven't written. I hope everything had a wonderful Thanksgiving! The past couple of weeks I've been trying to get all of my school work finished & get everything ready for my trip to India. I've also been feeling really down lately. Not only because J isn't here..but because of my "friends". There are a few people that I realized, in the last couple of weeks, that I just cannot rely on. These people made so many promises to me.."We'll always be there for you." "When J is gone, we'll hang out alll the time"..yeah, well I guess promises don't mean much to people these days. I thought I could count on these people and go to them whenever I needed to talk about J being away. But every time I try, they're "too busy" to hang out or they don't pick up when I  call or return my phone calls. So I've been trying to make it through all of this. But I  know I'll get through this..with or without them. 

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Thursday, November 18, 2010

Time difference

I really hate the time difference between where J is in Japan and where I am in Maryland..14 hours..when I'm waking up, he's getting ready for  bed. When he's waking up he's so rushed to get into work on time so we don't have much time to talk. Don't get my wrong, I am ecstatic I get to talk to my hubby as much I do. I really am soo lucky. But sometimes, it just gets too annoying. On the weekends we talk all the time. And then once the week starts, it's back to conflicting time  schedules and trying to catch each other before I go to class or he goes into work. I am getting super excited though because he gets to come home for Christmas!! Yayy :) My countdown has officially started! We get to spend 10 whole days together! I know it's not much, but it is definitely better then nothing! And then 3 days after Christmas, I'm headed to India for 3 weeks..and I don't know if I'm excited or not. =/ I have to Study Abroad for school, so I'm going to India. I'm excited to experience another culture, but I'm really worried about the whole safety issue. J says it's not too terrible there..but uhh I don't know if I believe him! hahaa. 

I really need to change my design on my blog. I'm not a fiancée any more, I'm a wife! I just wish I had the time. School has been keeping so busy..and stressed. But, I guess it's not too bad. I'd rather have things to do to make the time go by faster then have nothing to do at all. But still, who knew senior year of college would be soo stressful. I know I wasn't expected it! Have any ideas of how I should spiff up blog? Let me know!

I've been seeing pictures on the blogs I read of the Marine Corps Ball...and I must admit..I'm a bit jealous. I really wish I could have gone with my Marine. This is his last one, so I'll never have a chance to go. Unless he goes as a civilian next year. I don't know, we shall see I guess. All you ladies looked beautiful, by the way!

Well I need to get back to my school work..ughhh! Hope everyone's week is going well! <3
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Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Happy Birthday Marines!

Happy 235th Birthday Marine Corps! Thank you to all the brave men and women that fight for our freedom, fight for the things people take for granted, fight for me and for you. I am so blessed to be married to a Marine. I'm new the Marine lifestyle, so I don't know much. But I do know how thankful I am for the Marine Corps (and all other services too!) for what they do for us every single day and the sacrifices they make for our freedom. Oohrah! Semper fi! <3

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Sunday, October 31, 2010

It's not goodbye; it's see you later

J left on Friday. I feel so alone. I feel like the biggest part of my life is missing. I thought it would be easier this time around. It's not Afghanistan. It's not a war zone. It's just another country. But I was wrong. It is so hard. I miss him so much. I haven't talked to him yet. I just want to hear his voice. I want to know how he's doing, what he's seeing, if he likes the base, if the people are nice. I really was hoping this would go easier. But I can't stop crying. I feel so alone. It hurt so bad when I had to walk out of the airport without holding his hand or not being able to wake up to him the next morning or fall asleep in his arms. I really hope this will get easier..

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